Friday, 30 December 2016

How do I feel?

What seems ridiculous to me is that I, myself, am the only person, in this world that determines how I feel, surely? I mean, people add to how you end up feeling, so if someone does something hurtful and upsetting, then more often than not that’ll equate to how you feel. But why is that? Why is it that some people, certain people, have such a heavy load on your emotions and how you feel? It seems amazingly unfair and is so hard to control, from my point of view anyway. Why is it that we let our heads become so clouded with the effects of what someone else has done? I do anyway.

Some actions can make people sad, hurt, jealous, angry. It can make people do things, out of character things, that some may regret later on. However, are they really out of character if you manage to go through with these actions? Perhaps they’re entirely part of your character, suppressed inside you, and all you need is a certain person, a certain situation to make you finally act upon these feelings. Who knows, maybe thats a good thing…

I get angry. And then I overthink. And then I think “is this a reasonable enough reason to be angry? Would someone else be angry about this?” But then I think why not? Anger can only be produced if it is about something you’re passionate about or something/someone you love. So I believe I do have the right to be angry when certain situations occur. I don't want to go into these situations however. It’s just, the thing that really, really bothers me, is when people do things, hurtful things to you, which you’d never in a million years do to them. 

I don’t really get sad, I get angry. Because to me being angry is easier to deal with then being sad.



Sorry this isn’t like my previous blogs and that I haven’t posted in a while. I just needed an outlet to display my emotions briefly, as there isn't anyone I wish to speak to right now. I’ll probably end up deleting this once I’ve calmed down.

Wednesday, 16 November 2016

10 Amazing Reasons to Smile 
Today!

Don't get me wrong, we all have them days that consist of us being miserable and down and grumpy. And that's okay. However, it's so common and almost easier nowadays for people, including myself, to just focus on the negatives of situations and things etc. So, I came up with a short list, of just simple things that makes me feel more positive and makes me smile, so I hope it'll do the same for you!

1) You have the opportunity to do whatever you want in life. It's your life, do whatever you want, no matter what anyone else says, and do a bloody amazing job at it.

2) I can guarantee someone cares and loves you very much, in fact, they could be thinking about you right now.

3) If you think you'll have a great day, then you will. So, go and believe that you'll have a great day.

4) You're prettiest when you're happy and smiling.

5) Somewhere in the world, someone is having the best day of their life.

6) Blind people can smile, despite never seeing someone smile, as its a natural human reaction.

7) There's so much amazing food you have yet to try and great music you have yet to discover.

8) Every human is made from stardust, google it if you don't believe me!

9) You are a unique individual, with your own thoughts, experiences, opinions. So why not make more today?

10) You're alive.




Thank you all for reading, have a great day!
Mollie x

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Sunday, 13 November 2016

5 things that inspire me to write

I suppose this is a pretty personal blog post, in the sense that everyone will typically have their own reasons and inspirations on why they write and what they write about. However, if anyone is stuck on where to look for inspiration, hopefully this will help you out a bit!

1) Emotions:

For me this is probably my main inspiration, partly on what I end up writing about. By this I mean that, if something has happened, or in general I'm feeling a particular emotion very strongly, I'll write about it. So I'll write and explain about how I feel at that particular moment. To me it is quite therapeutic to do this, it helps me clear my head, especially when I don't particularly want to talk to anyone about how I'm feeling. Another tip as well, is that if you're writing about feeling extremely upset or angry, you may not want to read this back, so you can always just tear it up and throw it away after writing it. Therefore your minds a bit less crowded and you won't have to be reminded about whatever caused you to feel down.


2) Music

To me, taking inspiration from music is more about wondering why the artist made the song. So, whats the song about? Is it a personal experience to the artist? If so, can you relate to it in anyway? Is the tone of the song sadness, happiness, confusion etc? I think that you can really take a song and write a whole story just around the feeling you personally get from it. And what makes this one a great inspiration, is that everyone will write something different, even if you hear the same song, as it'll be interpreted by everyone differently.

3) Life/people watching

I suppose this links slightly to emotions, but it's a more branched out approach. For this one I mean taking into account situations going on all around you. For example overhearing a conversation and that sparking an idea in your mind. Or perhaps just being out and about and wondering how someone you see has managed to be at that exact spot the same time you are, what's their story, what's their background? 

4) Quotes

This is a really interesting one to me, because quotes are written from peoples own experiences and thoughts. So again, just like with music, people can take the same quote differently, depending on their own feelings and experiences. Some quotes can be quite mind ticking, so they get you thinking about how situations could cause someone to think a certain way and what has then led them to write that specific quote. So therefore you can write a whole story almost about how that quote came to be, just by the emotions and connotations you get from it.

5) Art

Personally, this isn't one of my main inspirations, but I know quite a few people where art to them can send their mind racing a hundred miles an hour. Perhaps if you're one of these people, spending the day at art museums, or even just looking at art online may spark some ideas on what to write. You could think about your initial reactions to the art, the feelings you get from it. You could notice the colours used and what connotations they hold and so on.

Thank you all for reading, have a great day!
Mollie x

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Wednesday, 9 November 2016

What I've been reading: 
'Candy' by Luke Davies - book review


Synopsis:

He met candy amid a lush Sydney summer. Gorgeous, sexy, free-spirited Candy. They fell in love fast, lots of laughter and lust, the days melting warmly into each other. He never planned to giver her a habit. But she wanted a taste. And wasn't love, after all, about sharing lives? Candy had a bit of money and in the beginning, everything was beautiful. Heady, heroin-hazed days, the world open and inviting. But when the money ran out, the craving remained, and the days ceased their luxurious stretch.

But there was still love. Only now, it was a threesome. Heroin had its own demands, its own timetable, and thoughts of nabbing the next fix hurled them into each day. Then, when desperation sets in, Candy will stop at nothing to secure a blast, as she and her lover become hostage to the nightmarish world of addiction.

Painful, sexy, tender, and charger with dark humour, Candy provocatively charts the daily rituals of two lovers maintaining a long-term junk habit. Told in stunningly vivid prose and set against the backdrop of suburban and urban Australia, Candy is both an electrifying and frightening glimpse of contemporary life and love.

Review

If you've read my '20 random facts about me' blog post, you'll see I stated this book as being my favourite book. I read this book a year or two ago, which is pretty heavy stuff for a 14/15 year old. However, I swear my dad purposely gave it to me to read, in order to put me off drugs forever, which I can tell you was much achieved and still retained until this day after reading this! But, my god it was an incredible read.

As you can tell from the synopsis, this book is all about a hauntingly beautiful, young couple who are madly in love with each other. So crazily in love with each other, you can physically feel the unbreakable connection they share. However their lives become consumed by heroin, the need for it and the devastating extent they'll go to in order to get it, placing a massively, ill-fated twist on everything.

For me and I'd guess many others, it's incredibly hard to comprehend the mindset of an addict, until you read this book and are transported into the mind of one. Davies' writing is faultless for being able to achieve this. To me it feels like he must have experienced, maybe not personally, but a heroin addiction, perhaps to a person close to him. In order for him to be able to evoke such an emotional, rollercoaster of a book. 

Personally, I'd say my favourite aspect of this book is the innocently, soul-mate-like couple you see at the beginning of the book and how that contrasts with the books ending on how they eventually end up. I don't want to give too much away, but the journey of the couples relationship is heart-wrenchingly, beautifully tragic.

Moreover, I found it fairly sobering that heroin was in no way prided in the book. Obviously, to the characters its the most glorious, essential thing in the world. However, the narrating character recognises the critical effects that will take hold if he continues his addiction. It almost relates to how when people are thirsty, we drink water. It's the urge of survival and I believe the characters feel this in the novel.

Ultimately, this book is about addiction. Although, its also about loss, love, desperation, lust, hope and then exhausting despair. The immense emotion and detail this book goes into about the chilling horror of having a heroin addiction is second to none. It's so captivating you feel as though you're the one experiencing the nightmare first hand. I honestly could not put this book down and have re-read it multiple times.

In all, this book is graphic and fairly blunt. It doesn't hold back. It describes the effects of heroin, how they got it, how their relationship changes due to heroin and so, so much more. I've never read anything remotely close to this book, which is just one reason why I love it so much. I would say this book isn't for the faint-hearted and is very much an emotional, heartbreaking, sobbing into the pages kind of book. However it is such an eye-opening, brilliant read that I'd completely recommend. 

Famous reviews:
  • "A tale of obsession, Candy offers a chilling glimpse into the nightmare world of heroin addiction." - ELLE, Australia 
  • "Beautifully written and tear-provokingly poignant... Davies' background as a poet - and the promise of hope - sustains the reader through a quagmire of collapsed veins and momentary bliss, vomit, bile, sweat, endless expletives, dizziness, nausea, scams and the overall sheer bloody exhausting despair of heroin addiction." - DAILY TELEGRAPH, Australia
My favourite quotes:

  • "When you think you are in love, you don't want to know about the things that could end it."
  • "And so she disappears from this story, or the story disappears."
  • "For a couple of I heard lots of things, some good, some bad. And then after a while I heard nothing."
I was thinking about perhaps doing a book review/what I read every month or so, kinda like a series to continue on this blog. The reason for this is because I love reading and sharing my opinions on books with you guys, so let me know what you think!

Thank you all for reading, have a great day!

Mollie x

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Sunday, 6 November 2016

Top 10 favourite TV characters of all time!

In todays blog, I've decided I'm going to be sharing my all time favourite TV characters, with all of you guys! I love getting into a good TV series and binge watching all of the episodes... Although who doesn't?? Saying that, this list will probably change over time, however for now, these are my favourite TV characters...

(P.S. As hard as it was to rate some of these characters against each other, I've gone in order of my least favourite to most favourite character. Enjoy!)


10) Stiles Stilinski - Teen Wolf

Stiles is 100% my favourite character from Teen Wolf. I love his humour and his sarcasm, Dylan O'Brien embodies this character way too well, it's honestly like this role was made for him. I feel like Stiles is one of my favourite TV characters because out of this list, he is defiantly one character that I'd most want to be friends with. Stiles as a character is just, hilarious, caring, relatable and just amazing really.


9) Serena Van Der Woodsen - Gossip Girl

For some reason, I feel like Serena is kinda underrated, as people usually tend to sway more towards Blair. But, for me I actually really love Serena's character. Firstly, her style is amazing, the amount of times I've sat watching Gossip Girl, envious of her outfits is ridiculous. For me, I like how her characters is always diverse, so she'll be with different people, try different jobs, she deals with personal issues, she's involved in drama... 99% of the time. The list goes on, but I love the character!


8) Rachel Green - Friends

I couldn't not include a character from Friends onto the list, and my favourite character happens to be Rachel. For me, I just thinks she's the most relatable, in the sense that as a character, she's most like myself I'd say, mostly due to her being the most dramatic. To me, Rachel is just an amazing character and literally just screams best friend material.


7) Spencer Hastings - Pretty Little Liars

Okay, there literally is no competition for me about which Liar is my favourite, it always has and always will be Spencer. The girl will do anything and I love it. I love how she's always involved, she's clever, she's sarcastic. Her character compared to the other three Liars is just more in depth and developed. Plus, I'd defiantly favour her expertise if I was being hunted by A.


6) William McKenzie - The Inbetweeners

It honestly would be an insult to this blog if I didn't include a character from the Inbetweeners. Every single time I watch the Inbetweeners, its always Will cracking me up the most, throughout the whole episode, no matter how many times I watch it. If I could pick anyone to embody British humour, I honestly think I'd pick Will to do so.




5) Klaus Mikaelson - The Vampire Diaries

Klaus was one of them characters that I absolutely loved the second he spoke, and carried on loving until he left the show, and after that to be honest. He can be a bit of an arse, he's a savage really, but I love it. His character in The Vampire Diaries makes me want to watch The Originals, just to see more of him. I will ALWAYS ship him and Caroline together. Literally always.


4) Katherine Pierce - The Vampire Diaries 

Again, absolute savage, bit of a crazy one, but I love her none the less. Nina Dobrev was amazing at playing Katherine, you honestly feel like it's another actress playing Elena, especially when they have scenes together. Katherine for me is just so fun to watch, she makes me laugh too and in all she's a great character.


3) Brooke Davis - One Tree Hill

I feel like this is kinda a typical character to chose but how could you not? Brooke, in my opinion, has the biggest character development throughout the show, but I love her in every stage of her character. She's so funny, relatable and just brilliant. A lot of my favourite OTH scenes include Brooke, so thats another reason I placed her number 3!


2) Nathan Scott - One Tree Hill

I literally love Nathan in every series, every episode, just everything really. Him with Jamie honestly just gets me, they're so adorable. Also, him and Haley are, without a doubt, the best couple on the show. Nathan as a character always has an exciting storyline and is just one of my favourite characters!


1) Damon Salvatore - The Vampire Diaries

How can you not include Damon onto your top 10 fave character list? His humour and sarcasm is always on point. I love the depth this character possesses, he's mysterious, he comes across a certain way which sometimes isn't really him. There is too much to say about why he's my favourite character, so I'll just leave it at that.


Thank you all for reading, have a great day!

Mollie x


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